cant even begin to describe the last few days.
basically, the back pain that bh has experienced has not been calmed by morphine.
she has been on a constant drip of it via a motorised syringe.
over the weekend, upon finding out that bh was still in pain, under relevant instruction the district nurses have replaced the syringe with a more potent feed.
meaning that by last night the poor girl was totally f*cked up as she was hallucinating to the max.
every minute of the night time session was damn scary.
after yet another sleepless night i awaited the hour of help, 9am, called the relevant people and said : ‘ok, that’s it, i need help .. ‘
the outcome is that she is now in a hospice with the various people trying to figure out the source of the back pain.
(something the hospital never did as they were all too busy eating chocolate and so just went ‘oh – she’s got cancer, here’s some more morphine’)
it seems that there could be a very simple reason for the back pain which involves the small issue that due to the chemical excess, bh has not cleared her bowels in weeks.
something so simple, but to date no-one has checked.
despite the fact a quick, non-intrusive x-ray would prove either way.
so there is a chance that once this is verified the poor girl is actually a lot better than previously believed.
i actually believe that there is actually a very big chance that this is the root cause to the pain as i’ve said all along that nobody has done any checks to see what could be the root cause.
to say i am fed up/emotionally drained/physically exhausted/down would be the understatement of the year.
thankfully, the hospice is very nice, the food excellent, and as far as i can tell, the care top notch, so at least one way or the other, we will hopefully get to know.
as i can easily confirm the ‘more morphine’ route was quite literally a living nightmare …..
why the f*ck anyone would take that shit for "fun" beggars belief